the YANGPA

Ask Korean fashion icon Andre Kim how to cure baldness and he’ll tell you.

“Paint. Lots of paint. On your forehead.”

Scientist from around the world are stunned at Kim’s revolutionary baldness treatment. “I was skeptical at first, but during a demonstration, he was able to undo years of baldness with just a few brushstrokes. And that was even before he put on the all-weather sealer,” said Harvard’s lead hairologist Henry Felser.

Kim says the idea came to him in a flash of insight. “I was painting my house, and as I looked into the full paint bucket, I thought to myself, ‘This looks exactly like human hair!'” It wasn’t long before Kim using the paint on his own head.

“At first, I was worried that it would look fake. But as you can see, those fears were unfounded. Go ahead, run your hands through my paint. Can you tell it’s not real?” According to Kim, this won’t be his last invention. “I’m developing a technique where we can cure shortness with really big hats.”

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